values

I had a moment on Tuesday afternoon. I had just finished an all-day training event focused on developing part of my career. During the training, the hosts asked us before each break to “take the break,” implying that we should relax, decompress, and meditate over what we’d just taken in. I did not take breaks. Instead, I spent my breaks returning missed calls, replying to a seemingly long list of text messages, catching up on emails, and just barely squeezing in a bathroom break before it was time to return.

My moment came not at the end of my training, but rather after I spent another hour catching up on work before zooming across town for an evening appointment. I’d just wrapped up with a client and then I took a call with bad news about another client of mine. By the time I got off the phone, I felt physically exhausted, mentally tapped, and emotionally drained. I then called my wife only to hear that she was at our son’s soccer practice and that they were just finishing. I’m not going to lie, I was devastated. How had I, the guy who is always preaching about values, habits, and time blocking, worked a twelve hour day, missed an important family event, and betrayed my own values?

On Wednesday morning, I grabbed my go-to reference book for moments like these… The ONE Thing, by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. Right inside the cover you are met with two sets of animal tracks leading across the page and then diverging on the next, with the words

“If you chase two rabbits… you will not catch either one.”

-Russian Proverb

I realized that I had been doing just that. I already had two businesses running and had recently made the decision to explore another venture, all the while growing and developing myself in one of my core businesses. Can you relate? Have you found yourself pursuing more than one thing and not gaining traction on any of them? If so, read on!

Part 1 of The ONE Thing is “The Lies – They mislead and derail us.” As I went down the list, a list I’d read many times before, I realized I had disregarded several of them. They are:

1. Everything matters equally – Equality is a lie. When you have a lot to get done in a day, how do you know what to do first? Achievers work from a clear sense of priority. Employ the focusing question (see below) to help guide your decision.
2. Multitasking – There is no such thing! What we do is multi-switch. The trouble with multi-switching is that it takes time, after switching, to orient to the new task and time again to orient back to the prior task. It is best practice to focus on when task (starting with your ONE Thing) and see it through to completion before starting the next task.
3. A disciplined life – Success is about doing the right thing… Not doing everything right. Focusing on the right thing and building habits around that will lead to your greatest self.
4. Willpower is always on will-call – Think of your energy in each day like the battery on your cell phone. When you wake up in the morning, you are at 100%. As you perform tasks and make decisions throughout the day you chip away at that energy. It’s important to capitalize on your most important tasks, because not everything matters equally, when you are fresh.
5. A balanced life – There is no such thing as balance in life. At our very best, just like an acrobat on a tight rope, we counter our balance with short side-to-side movements. Sometimes we have to swing toward work and put in extra effort, however it must immediately be followed with a counter into your personal life or you will fall.
6. Big is bad – The only actions which become springboards to success are those which come from big thinking. Think Big – Act Big – Succeed Big

Can you guess which of the lies I was living? As I wrote in my journal that morning, I reflected on my core values, which are: Health, Family, and Empowerment. I took out my planner and reviewed the rest of my week, my to-do list, and my success list. I cleared time, by time-blocking and prioritizing those things which aligned with my values, first, revised my success list, and found time to spend the next two nights together with my wife.

Even practice leaders need a reality check and a reset every once in a while. If you’re stuck and you find yourself looking at your calendar and to-do list, take a minute to reflect on your own values, your goals, your BIG WHY, and ask yourself the focusing question:

What’s the ONE Thing I can do, such that by doing it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?

If you need to go further back, join me on Tuesday for my Your Big Why webinar. Get clarity on your own core values and use them, alongside your goals, to gain clarity on what matters most.